Cycles of Pain,Conflict and Drama

The bottom line? Someone doesn’t have to be a bad person to not be good for you.

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Some-persons-have-a

I was reminded of something of importance last evening in a overt manner .

As a former drama queen it resonated with me.

Many are similar in dealing with the aftermath of breakups in relationships.

I can not fault anyone for the ongoing drama in the rollercoaster of one’s mind.

The what if’s and why scenario’s.
Why did he do this too me?
Why did I allow him to treat me so badly IF it could only inadvertently result in relationship deterioration and breakdowns. Why did I tolerate the crap so long?
We become so desensitized to the conflict drama and ongoing belittlement of us.We get used to feeling like we in fact must be the crazee one, or why would they not have loved us as they promised too do in the beginnings of the relationship.

The Path Forward

Initially, he’s the man of your dreams, then he becomes maddeningly unavailable.This is coming from a deep place of fear that he’s not hearing or understanding you, so you feel compelled to pursue a resolution very intensely.

Depending on the guy, he’ll either give in and continue the fight or pull away and make you feel even more neglected.
It’s easy to chalk that up to the men you’re in a relationship with.

conflict.jpg

While they certainly may be at fault if you truly start to feel as though they’re always the same, you might be the common denominator.
You~They may have a self-imposed doormat policy in effect and not even know it.

The important thing to remember is it’s this loss of routine that is causing you pain. Don’t make the mistake of misinterpreting this pain as being intrinsically connected to the love you shared with your ex.

Settling means, at some level, you resent (i.e. resist) some of these differences but choose to live with them because it would be too uncomfortable or scary to do otherwise. The trouble with settling is it tends to grow like a cancer until you’ve found that your entire relationship is just one big resentment-filled settlement (i.e. you are now officially just roommates).

or perhaps THEY are like a comfy pair of bedroom slippers you have a problem letting go of.

In psychology, desensitization is defined as the diminished emotional responsiveness to a negative, aversion or positive stimulus after repeated exposure to it.

Some persons have a defined relationship where they thrive on drama … They have become addicted to the dysfunction, the toxicity of their relationship to the point that they have lost the meaning of what is healthy, what is normal, and what they as individuals deserve.

Drama is like a game of ping pong. Someone has to hit the ball back to you if you want to have a game. When you refuse to play, their drama gets diffused. As they see your commitment to this new way of life, their drama will begin to decrease.

The bottom line? Someone doesn’t have to be a bad person to not be good for you.

Jar_Of_Hearts

and you are not a bad person for wanting too be happy in a dysfunctional world of betrayals.

Meanderings~Take6

When I woke up my hair looked so good I didn’t even brush it.


11:10 PM 6/4/2017
Do You know the pronunciation of these words?

https://www.merriam-webster.com/

Winters Tale:
I gave HORSE wings

Rainbow_Wings_Horse

claret
red Bordeaux wine

fillet
silent T
a piece or slice of boneless meat or fish; especially :  the tenderloin of beef

wallet
a bag for carrying miscellaneous articles while traveling

Ballet
silent T
a dance or ballet like performance

valet
silent T
an attendant who parks cars for patrons at a hotel, restaurant

12:41 PM 6/7/2017

RIPTIDE Lyrics

VANCE JOY

I was scared of dentists and the dark
I was scared of pretty girls and starting conversations
Oh, all my friends are turning green
You’re the magician’s assistant in their dreams

Oh, and they come unstuck

Lady, running down to the riptide
Taken away to the dark side
I wanna be your left hand man
I love you when you’re singing that song and
I got a lump in my throat because
You’re gonna sing the words wrong

There’s this movie that I think you’ll like
This guy decides to quit his job and heads to New York City
This cowboy’s running from himself
And she’s been living on the highest shelf

Oh, and they come unstuck

Lady, running down to the riptide
Taken away to the dark side
I wanna be your left hand man
I love you when you’re singing that song and
I got a lump in my throat because
You’re gonna sing the words wrong

I just wanna, I just wanna know
If you’re gonna, if you’re gonna stay
I just gotta, I just gotta know
I can’t have it, I can’t have it any other way
I swear she’s destined for the screen
Closest thing to Michelle Pfeiffer that you’ve ever seen, oh

Lady, running down to the riptide
Taken away to the dark side
I wanna be your left hand man
I love you when you’re singing that song and
I got a lump in my throat because
You’re gonna sing the words wrong

Oh lady, running down to the riptide
Taken away to the dark side
I wanna be your left hand man
I love you when you’re singing that song and
I got a lump in my throat because
You’re gonna sing the words wrong

Oh lady, running down to the riptide
Taken away to the dark side
I wanna be your left hand man
I love you when you’re singing that song and
I got a lump in my throat because
You’re gonna sing the words wrong
I got a lump in my throat because you’re gonna sing the words wrong

12:29 AM 6/9/2017
Just watched “The Girl On The Train” It sure keeps you guessing.

Awesome movie!~ we never know what goes on in another’s mind. What pain they cover with addictions. The pain and heartache of past traumas in their lives.

When I woke up my hair looked so good I didn’t even brush it.

Posted The Key West Boat Kids again. It was in my old zimbabast site with yahoo on word press. When I canceled my website the blog went too.

https://cryominute.wordpress.com/2017/06/08/key-west-boat-kids/

Prisms for Light (Life)

 

7:30 AM 6/9/2017
Funny thing. Roosters here have no sense of time.They are laid back like the Island folk and crow at all hours

8:39 PM 6/9/2017
Relationships

Proceed with Caution

WHY DO MEN FALL OUT OF LOVE WITH YOU?

REASON 1

THE HONEYMOON PERIOD ENDS

A common complaint you hear from men who have fallen out of love is,

“Things just aren’t the same between us anymore..”

or

“My feelings have changed…”

It’s actually really ironic because the only reason they say things like this is because they get so used to how the relationship feels during the honeymoon period that they grade everything on the relationship based on that feeling.

IMHO
When someone says “conditions” it sounds to me like the opposite of unconditional. If you have survived tough times together and Now when things could be better they are with conditions instead of unconditionally.”

Reminds me of someone who was so enamored in the beginning.

Immersed in The winning Game. The ins and outs. Losing was not an option.

Now they idly set (Sense of running slowly and steadily without little input)in the bleachers. Seldom showing enthusiasm or willing participation.

Ambivalent to how the Game ends.

It’s 4 AM in the morning and I am AWAKE????

Another web page that was on zimbabast.
I just blogged it.

https://cryominute.wordpress.com/2017/06/10/crikeywe-miss-you/

Posted Between Darkness and light

Having been born into the astrological sign of Scorpio, ruled by Pluto by day and Mars by night. I found much food for thought and retrospect.

https://cryominute.wordpress.com/2017/06/10/between-darkness-and-light/

 

Ninnyhammer


Unplugged

(Click to Enlarge)

Definition of Ninnyhammer

A fool or a silly person.
Analysis: The word “fool,” unless you’re Mr. T, is sometimes woefully inadequate to express the stupidity of the person you’re talking about. So use Ninnyhammer. Or at least ‘Ninny’.

“Love Bombers”

Enchanting Bow After The Rain


Ground_Rainbow_Bedford

(Click to Enlarge)

R A I N B O W

© Photography by Karen M.

Always keep looking up, or you might miss it. On the other hand occasionally look down so you don’t trip up Winking smile

Remember the rainbow, not the storm.

Your reality is how you perceive the illusion of it.

© C. m ART z  2015

“When experiencing profound love, but unable to change for the better, losing this love can repair another.

To quote Carol Burnett, ‘You have to love someone enough to let them hate you.’

Sometimes we must leave abusers to teach them love after first letting them experience

it, if love by itself is not enough. The loss of it can be profound.”

Source:

http://www.tokenrock.com/blogs/once-broken-repair-is-a-long-hard-climb-1232.html

Holding On to That Limb


Neon_Monkey_Clipart

Edits by C. m ART z

Clipart found at http://www.123rf.com/photo_11221824_monkey-swing.html

“Some people are simply that way; they won’t let go of the branch, till they have a firm grip on the next.
Yep, some people, are like monkey’s on a tree. They hold on to that limb for dear life. They only let go when they are positive someone else is waiting to pick them up.”

The Ties That Bind – Releasing Toxic Relationships : In5D Esoteric, Metaphysical, and Spiritual Database


In the Art of Bushido a true “warrior” is asked to find Gratitude when a weakness is exposed, as it gives them an Opportunity to reinforce their armor, if you will. A toxic relationship is where we find the same kind of opportunity for Gratitude and Growth. But we must remove our own energy from the energy of the poisonous interaction, and change it, in order to release the ties that bind.

via The Ties That Bind – Releasing Toxic Relationships : In5D Esoteric, Metaphysical, and Spiritual Database.

warrior_light

Photo Source Unknown

Relationship Boomerang: Why It’s Hard to Get Rid of a Psychopath | Psychopathyawareness’s Blog


 

I changed my number

via Relationship Boomerang: Why It’s Hard to Get Rid of a Psychopath | Psychopathyawareness’s Blog.