Total Eclipse of the MOON
27th of August 2007
He came around 7 PM. He brought a bottle of sprite and a pint of rum. We watched some TV and I was getting ready to fix our dinner plates and he said he was not very hungry. He said he needed to tell me something. I smiled and asked if he had dessert elsewhere.
Then he tells me that 3 weeks ago he was with her and the condom broke. At first I said “You are kidding” and then realized by the anguished look on his face that indeed he was telling me the truth and being HONEST.
It did shock me; but with all the dreams of mama and dad of late; and his saying he felt the impression of my mama sitting beside him as he laid in bed. He just had to tell me and get it off his chest.
I am hurt, confused as to the why?
He says continuously that it is just moments with her and that his heart is so full of me and how much he loves me. I told him this am before he left that this was forever the last time he could expect much in the way of trust and confidence from me.
That we would go on and if he felt that NEED again to not hide it; to be open and communicate his feelings too me instead of putting blame, accusations and insinuations on my plate.
I was in No way going to jump from a very cool spot into a HOT inferno with him.
So this is how it went and how it goes, the ball is in his court.
He can bounce and screw us up or he can play straight with me.
I told him I would survive no matter.
I told him he tells me whatever pops in his head and it is getting very one-sided.
We even discussed the three-day waiting period sexually that I told him I had already noticed and was up on.
The deceit, the lies, the half-truths.
Why is it so important that he tells me this crap ?
Like I say he says what suits him, I am over it.
I would like to say that was the end of it. She wasn’t pregnant. We continued on.
Then his next conquest entered the picture.
I told him do not call, do not come to my house. I even told him to forget the large sum of money he still owes me.
I am free of him.